The Horde
| Developer: Toys for Bob | Graphics: |
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| Publisher: Crystal Dynamics | Sound: |
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| Year: 1994 (1996 on Saturn) | Difficulty: |
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| Genre: Action-strategy | Lastability: |
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| Number of players: 1 | Rating: |
4/10 | |
I remember this game mainly for its video sequences, shot with costumed actors and surprisingly well done, in their deliberately goofy style. The only downside is that you have to actually play the game in between these videos…
In the ’80s, LaserDisc technology allowed video integration in games. It was expensive and limited to arcades, and the trend didn’t last long considering the minimal added value it offered players (see the review for Dragon’s Lair).
The arrival of CD-ROMs in the mid-’90s, however, democratized video usage, freeing developers from storage limits. In extreme cases, it also freed them from any need for programming skills whatsoever. And thus, a wave of so-called “FMV” games (for Full Motion Video) flooded into homes—often low-budget, poorly acted, and even more poorly dubbed.
The Horde isn’t quite your run-of-the-mill “FMV game” since there’s no interaction with the videos; they just play between levels instead of traditional cutscenes. Let us nevertheless point out the occasional computer-generated imagery, which demonstrate a certain ambition.
The story follows Chauncey, a humble peasant raised by a herd of kind wild cows (who found him in a carrot field, or so the French version helpfully explains). During a banquet, he saves the king from choking, and in gratitude, the monarch bestows upon him his sword, Grimthwacker, along with a plot of fertile land—periodically besieged by a horde of ravenous creatures (think red goblins). This laid-back king reminds me of Otto from Malcolm in the Middle.
The game was developed for the Panasonic 3DO console, ported to PC in 1994, and later to Sega Saturn in 1996 (by Silicon Knights). It’s considered one of the precursors to the tower defense genre. You’re tasked with protecting a village from waves of monsters by strategically placing traps or “guard towers”. Okay, so technically, there aren’t guard towers—knights and archers you recruit just stand there like stakes, even if a villager is beeing gnawed on a few feet away.
Each season plays out in two phases. First, there’s the peaceful village management stage, where you prepare defenses and set up revenue streams (plant or chop trees, buy cows). Sadly, you have zero control over the peasants, who (if they survive) prosper, build new farms, and expand their fields recklessly, poking holes in the defenses you painstakingly erected. Then, when the countdown ends, the horde attacks, and you take direct control of Chauncey. This is the action phase, which ends when all the monsters are defeated. Afterward, it’s tax time. If your crops or livestock were destroyed, you might not have enough to pay your ever-increasing taxes, and it’s game over.
One frustrating factor is the limited time to prepare the village’s defenses, which highlights the interface’s shortcomings. The cursor is painfully slow and locked to a non-orthogonal “grid”, making control both imprecise and irritating. Panzer General used a similar interface, but with one key difference: no time limit, and it works much better.
The first seasons are critical, as your long-term success depends on how much gold you’ve amassed, which itself hinges on making early investments. However, there are several counterintuitive tricks you’ll need to know in order to maximize your income. Neither the game nor the manual will explain these; I learned them the hard way—which meant too late—forcing several restarts.
For instance, you’re supposed to guess that after a given number of seasons, the king will grant you new land (even more hostile), and you’ll only keep whatever gold you have on hand. The only way to be financially prepared for this relocation is to sell all your cattle, soldiers, and other structures just before the final battle. Of course, the game doesn’t tell you when the last battle is. So, if you keep spending on defending your village, it’s all wasted!
Oh, and want to know some fun facts about cows? They graze (any Scrabble player could tell you). This produces methane and, apparently, gold coins. How to spot a productive cow? It wags its tail. If it doesn’t, that means all the grass under it is consumed, and it stops… “functioning”. These poor beasts, like your soldiers, can’t move on their own, so you have to “relocate” them by clicking as if to sell, and then “re-summon” them a few tiles away, on fresh grass. Half my playtime was spent “teleporting cows that stopped wagging their tail”. It gets old fast, and I’ve seen deeper strategy mechanics…
On to the action phase—this will be quick…
Let’s just say the clunky controls faithfully capture poor Chauncey’s inability to wield a sword larger than he is! Not to mention, he frequently gets stuck in the scenery, and the isometric 3D view naturally causes visibility issues (enemies hidden behind objects). The game’s cardinal sin? A real time inventory managed by scrolling icons. Even though you’re required to make rapid decisions with enemies coming from all directions, you lose precious seconds every time you need a different weapon by scrolling through your item collection and hoping you’ve chosen the shorter scroll direction!
Seriously, if you can’t implement responsive controls, it’s fine: just use a standard inventory screen and pause the game when it’s accessed!
In the end, I can’t remember a game where my first and last impressions differed so drastically. The intro made me laugh, and for that, I was in my most forgiving mood. The first levels were tolerable, thanks to funny sound effects and cartoonish animations. But as things progressed, oppressive difficulty, terrible handling, and a lack of any apparent strategy killed my enthusiasm. Playing this game was a chore and so was writing this review, trying to describe its most baroque mechanics!
The PC version is smoother and faster, but given the lack of precision (even with a mouse), I’m not sure that’s a selling point. All screenshots are from the Saturn version.
If you’re interested in a game that combines action and management, one other title did it more successfully: ActRaiser (Super Nintendo, 1990).
And if you want to see a spiritual successor to The Horde: Orcs Must Die! (2011). However, I can’t recommend its sequels.
At a glance, any of the few experts in this game will likely spot my fatal error: I grouped my cows into a herd, naively thinking it would be easier to defend them that way. Yet another arbitrary and unexplained mechanic—turns out the cows need to be spaced out. Otherwise, they … er … poop rocks, if I understood correctly. This is why I had to reposition my cows at the start of each round, cutting into precious building time. By the desert level, the game became unplayable because I no longer had time to irrigate my land. I realised my mistake only after watching someone else play (on YouTube), hours of frustration later, right before I gave up for good.
As for the non-experts of this game, they will have absolutely no idea what that last paragraph was about.
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